The case of the missing clinic cat

By Scott Lackenby | Dated December 11, 2015

Hey gang! How are you all? I am much better than I was. This week, it’s all about me! I was a little reluctant to post about it, I don’t like it when I get in trouble, but the humans here at GVH have convinced me to tell you all about my most recent adventure. I’m just hoping that Santa wasn’t looking and still brings me presents. I really wasn’t that naughty…

It all started on Friday. I got a parcel from Nurse Katrina. I was excited because I thought it might be a tasty treat for me but it was a Santa suit. For me to wear. I was naturally dressed up and had half the clinic taking photos of me. Now, granted, the photos are good, I’m a handsome cat and I take an amazing pic. But I was less than impressed with being dressed up for the humans amusement. But being a well behaved clinic cat, I sucked it up and posed for the pics.

The next day was Saturday which also happened to be the GVH Christmas party. And yet again, I wasn’t invited. I can’t believe that yet again they didn’t think to organise some Joey-friendly activities. I mean, lets face it, I am the most valued staff member. But no, everyone was excitedly talking about how much fun there were going to have. Without me. So I decided to have a sulk, I mean sleep, on my new fave possie, one of the lab machines. Unfortunately, Dr Sam decided she needed to use the lab machine, (selfish, I know), so I got moved. So I went outside to show my displeasure about it all. And I stayed out. I didn’t come home for dinner. I didn’t come home when Dr Sam popped in at 11pm on her way home from the Christmas party. The Christmas party I wasn’t invited to.

The next day, Sunday, Nurse Nicole was working with Dr David Owen and Nurse Pippa. They were confident that I would be meowing at the door when they arrived. I’d been out since Saturday morning, so I had missed morning tea, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner and supper. There was no way I’d miss breakfast, right? WRONG! No Joey to be found on Sunday morning. By now, the word had spread that I was AWOL and everyone was starting to worry. It wasn’t like me to be gone this long or miss this many meals. Nurse Pippa searched up Bridge St and up past the gym. She even searched behind the gym, I spend time there talking to the lizards, and even asked my friends at the gym if they’d seen me. Nothing. Panic was now setting it. What if I’d been stolen? What if someone had accidentally taken me home? (I have a habit of getting into cars when people aren’t looking) What if I’d been hit by a car? What if I got a tick? The usually calm Nurses forgot all the important info they give clients in this situation, I was microchipped, I had a collar and tag and I was up to date with my Frontline spray. Nope, instead of keeping calm, they worked themselves into a tizzy! Nurse Portia came in to search, Nurse Layne called multiple times during the day for updates. Even Nurse Katrina was kept in the loop!

Nurse Nicole finished at 6pm on Sunday and spent a lot of time looking for me. She checked around the Post Office, another of my fave places, and still nothing. She went back to the gym. Still nothing. I had now been missing for 30hrs. This is the part of the story I’m the most ashamed of. Nurse Nicole cried. Everyone was still hoping that when the rest of the business’ got back on Monday morning, that it would turn out that I had gotten myself locked in somewhere, I have been locked in at Snap next door before and my good friend Cheryl had to come and let me out.

Nurse Layne called Nurse Hollie on Sunday night and they organised to come in early on Monday morning to look for me. They got there at 6:30am. While Nurse Hollie was parking her car, Nurse Layne headed up the back stairs to have a look in the building site. I talk to a lot of lizards in there. While she was there, she heard a glorious sound, meowing!! I was finally found sitting on a wall that is easily 100 metres high! (Ok, so that’s probably a slight exaggeration, but when you’ve been missing for as long as I have and have missed as many meals I have, it’s pretty high!)

Nurse Layne started screaming that she’d found me! Now the next problem was how to get me down! I clearly wasn’t coming down on my own, and Nurse’s Layne and Hollie thought they may have to ask my friends at the Fire Station for help! While Nurse Hollie was getting a ladder, Nurse Layne climbed through the jungle of the building site, and convinced me that it was ok to jump down. So I did. Nurse Layne grabbed me and rushed me inside. Once we were inside, I wanted to be put down. I smooched around Nurse Layne and Nurse Hollie’s legs a few times, walked over to my food bowl, which was empty, and asked for it to be filled up. I was spoilt with a big breakfast. Nurse Hollie weighed me and I had lost 300gms over the weekend! While I settled myself in for a well deserved 6hour nap on Dr Scott’s chair,(he didn’t even move me, that’s how happy he was to have me home!) the good news was passed around that I was home safe and sound. Nurse Nicole was the first person Nurse Layne called. After a 6hour nap, I was ready to go outside again. But for some reason I wasn’t allowed…. After all of this, Nurse Layne said she’s going to look into a GPS collar for me so I’ll never go missing again!!

So what’s the moral of the story? If you don’t want your cat to run away, don’t dress them up and make sure they are included in the Christmas party celebrations and they can sleep on any machine they want! Well, better go. Meows for now, love from Joey, a very lucky clinic cat xoxo